It’s that time of year again, when ghost stories and witches’ grimoires and mad-scientists’ diaries remind us that in every writer lurks a story full of magic, monsters, dark woods, jump scares, and unexplained phenomena. Take this quiz to find out what kind of Halloween writer you are, and ho your Halloween mentor is….
Your favorite scary setting is:
1. A. Caves
2. B. Creepy Old Houses
3. C. The woods
4. D. Outer space
5. E. Maine
Your heroes tend to be:
1. A. Out-of-towners
2. B. Witches, wizards, and shamans
3. C. Cops, FBI agents, and/or psychiatrists
4. D. Astronauts and/or Earthlings
5. E. Locals
Your villains tend to be:
1. A. Vampires and/or zombies—emotional and/or literal
2. B. Witches, ghosts, and/or faeries
3. C. Sociopaths and/or serial killers
4. D. Mad scientists, mad kings, and/or mad CEOs
5. E. All manner of monsters—earthbound and extraterrestrial
Your favorite theme is:
1. A. The undead are living among us
2. B. Magic is real
3. C. Never trust quiet neighbors who keep to themselves
4. D. We are not alone; the truth is out there.
5. E. Things that go bump in the night
Your favorite Halloween read is:
1. A. Interview with a Vampire
2. B. Practical Magic
3. C. The Silence of the Lambs
4. D. Anything by Michael Crichton
5. E. Anything by Stephen King
Your favorite Halloween viewing is:
1. A. True Blood
2. B. Ghost
3. C. Dexter
4. D. The X Files
5. E. Halloween
You like to read (and write) endings where:
1. A. (Nearly) everybody becomes undead
2. B. Good magic prevails
3. C. The cops catch the killers
4. D. The good scientists catch the bad scientists
5. E. (Nearly) everybody dies
You give your protagonist:
1. A. A true love
2. B. A familiar
3. C. A loyal partner
4. D. A skeptical partner
5. E. As little help as possible
Your favorite way to kill off characters is:
1. A. Biting them
2. B. Casting a spell on them
3. C. Slowly
4. D. Bizarrely
5. E. Meanly
In your stories, you draw the line at killing off:
1. A. Clergy
2. B. Animals
3. C. Kids
4. D. Smart kids
5. E. What line?
To raise the stakes, you threaten to destroy:
1. A. A love interest
2. B. A secondary character
3. C. A beloved character
4. D. A planet
5. E. All of the above
When you hit the bestseller list, you reward yourself with a:
1. A. (Creepy) doll collection
2. B. A cottage by the sea
3. C. A tour of the Body Farm
4. D. A trip to outer space
5. E. Whatever the hell you want
For Halloween, you’ll dress up as:
1. A. A vampire
2. B. A witch
3. C. A medical examiner
4. D. Albert Einstein
5. E. Pennywise the Clown